I Hate UPS (and other such shippers at Christmas)

I'm having a waz with UPS today. Well, right at this moment, actually. I was just getting ready to sit down and check out the ole blog for the first time since the holiday when my door bell rings - twice. I figure it's my cleaning ladies, bless their little hearts. They never knock even though they ALWAYS come during nap time. But that is neither here nor there. My door bell rings twice so I run to the front door in an effort to keep whomever from ringing a third or fourth time. But, what a second...no one is there! Is someone door bell ditching me in the middle of the afternoon? Are we in third grade again? And just as I'm closing the door, (eyeing all my neighbors front blinds to try and catch a snickering prankster) the UPS girl peels out of my driveway and down the street. I'm a little peeved that she didn't wait for me to answer, but giddy all the same as I'm anticipating this to be my first Christmas delivery. I've been faithfully tracking all of my purchases for days now as 90% of my Christmas shopping was done online this year.

So, I skamper through my house and out to the garage, wondering which shipment I get to dig through first. I click the garage door opener and see two boxes. One tidy little brown box, anonymous and intact. I figure this one to be my christmas cards. (Yay! It's after Thanksgiving so I can send them out tomorrow!!! Wahoo! And then post one here, of course.)
But then I take a good look at the second box. This is what I saw.








Please notice the condition of the box. I did nothing to this box before I took these pictures. I wish I had a way to add audio for you all, t00, (remember, I'm a bloginner) so you could hear what I heard as I moved the box around. It sounds like a set of broken dishes. And you can't see it in these pics, but there is actually a screw sticking out of the bottom of the box. Gee, I wonder how many more of those managed to escape during transit?

The other thing I would like you all to take note of is the non-anonymity of this box. Hello? Is it not Christmas? Could we not all assume that this might be a Christmas Present? What in the world is UPS Girl doing leaving this in broad daylight? I mean, if she thought I wasn't home, how would placing it right in front of the garage I come and go by be the safest place? The box is as big as my child. Do we really think she wouldn't notice it?

I'm at a loss here. I had no intention of setting this thing up right away, for obvious reasons (such as where to store a fully assembled kitchen where four little snoopies wouldn't find it or notice it draped under a large sheet). But now, I almost have to, just to be sure all the pieces are there. I mean, I can just hear the expletives coming out of Hubby's mouth in the wee hours of Christmas morning when he's looking for one last screw that fell out somewhere between here and Taiwan (or wherever the dang thing hails from).

Or, do I call Costco and ask them to please send a replacement right away, just in case? And can I demand it be wrapped in pillows before shipping? What to do? Can I refuse a package based solely on the condition of the box, even though UPS Girl has already come and gone? UGGHHH. This was the one gift I was THE most excited about. I should have know it would inevitably turn out to be my biggest headache.